These past couple of years has been challenging. It’s been a constant roller coaster of ups and downs. Yet, whatever day I was having, towards the end of it I’m brought to my knees thanking God for everything He blessed me with. The beginning of 2018 started off very rocky. As a human being I couldn’t help but be completely brought down by it all. I was stressed beyond imagination. I continued to fight for faith. Honestly, even the faith the size of a pea, was something I was willing to hold on to. I can’t be mad at God. He has a plan for my life. As I mentioned before, I am human. So I become scared and weary. I just have to keep my faith. I can relate to people who question their faith, question why God allowing things to happen. You see, we cannot become upset over the events we have no control over. The more we fight and try to make sense of what God is doing we will never fully be under the grace of God.
I pray someone out there understands me here. My faith has been tested for the past two years since I have reconnected with our Father God. He has seen me through and through. He has put people in my path who want to help me. It doesn’t make all of my problems instantly disappear but it helps me to grow, learn, and become a vessel for God’s work. Writing about God in hopes that someone, one or two of my readers, may understand or feel like their faith is constantly tested as well – but refuse to give up because of our Father God helps me as well. It has been so crazy and stressful that at 26 years old, this year, I found one strand of white hair! –laughs – The strand of hair isn’t even all white, just about a ¼ of it starting from the root. That didn’t stop me from freaking out though! I like to think that’s God trying to be funny. God works in miraculous ways. We never know how He will bless us. We never know how He will answer our prayers because He will do it in a way we were least expecting.
Writing and blogging was always the best outlet for my emotions. I am an emotional person – though over the past few years being able to express it has been difficult. Anytime I write and make a post on my blog, I start to feel better emotionally, physically, and most recently spiritually. Sharing my reconnection with God all of you helps me tremendously. This morning I was listening to Joel Osteen via YouTube on my way to work. The specific sermon I was listening this morning was titled “Ease is Coming – Joel Osteen”. I picked that video because the word “ease” spoke to me. Many times all I ever want is peace and understanding of what God is doing in my life. Some days my problems seem so ginormous that I can’t seem to find any peace. “Ease” as a noun means “absence of difficulty or effort” as a verb “move carefully, gradually, or gently”. I told myself I was giving up trying to control every aspect of my life and I was giving it all to God. Giving everything to God isn’t easy at first. But once you start, even just a little bit, you can instantly feel his mercy and grace on your life. I was always able to find my way back to the peace of God even after panicking for the greater part of the day.
For anyone going through a tough season(s) remember that you are not alone. Find comfort in God, family, friends. God works in miraculous ways. Even when you don’t see a way, know that God sees all things we cannot. He has a plan for our lives. He will not abandon us, and He will not forsake us. May God lead you today as you go out there and conquer the good, the bad, and the ugly. All glory be to God.
*side note: my aunt-in-law texted me as I was creating this post and this was what she said, “Good morning how u feeling this morning I pray your spirits are better have a beautiful blessed day (heart emojis)” I inserted that text to say this, whether it’s a stranger or a love one, someone is praying for you. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable and seek help or comfort from someone. If at first you don’t know who to turn to, turn to God. He will help bring the right people to you when the time is right. God is always on time.